3 siblings including me in the family.
yet,
quite often that only left me myself at home.
my brother quite oftenly has to go outstation for his work.
and, maybe,
after he changes his job,
he might have to leave the family for the month of one or two in the oversea.
while my sister is spending her 3 years in Borneo for her tertiary studies.
she would only come back when she's on quite a long break.

so well,
its only left me myself at home sometimes,
often felt that the home is so quiet.
i have no one for me to argue with,to talk with, to have fun with.
there's too little time for me to mix with them anymore.
its always so quiet at home.
even when my brother came home late sometimes.
i do understand their situation that they have to study or have to work,
yet,
i do still feel lonely and quiet at home without.
maybe,
i always feel that our relationship is quite good and close.
i do appreciate this.

for the past few years,
when i actually started to think a little bit more mature,
a little bit more rational,
i would always hope and wanted to have a younger brother or sister.
but then,
i would always prefer to have a younger sister.
maybe, because i am a guy,
so i wanted a younger sister.

of course,
i understand that i would actually face alot of problems and difficulties on her,
but then,
its all worth it when everything become good and the relationship become closer and closer.
although,
the burden will be heavier as i do have to take care of her if i do have one.
i dont know.
but i would like to try about.
trying myself to take care of a younger sister.
helping her and protecting her as a brother as well.
yes,
and of course,
i wouldnt be so badly lonely and boring anymore at home.
at least,
there would be someone else to cheer the mood in the house up.

the relationship between siblings is so much different compared to relationship between parents and son.
although,
i always have a good time with my mother and,
we have quite a lot of conversation as well.
but then,
the feeling of being together with the siblings will always be different.

i always wanted a younger sister,
but,
i knew,
this hope is simply unreachable.


well,
i also do understand that,
although people always tend to treat some friends really like siblings,
but then,
some of them may seems to forget everything when times pass by.
and,
they might not come and find you ever again.
i just dont feel good about it.

yes,
i actually still remember that i used to have some this kind of sisters.
but then,
its been very hard to look for them.
both of us are actually quite busy with our studies.
yes,
i do miss them quite a lot.
i would love to sit down and have some break with them.
however,
they wont be here.